HI
Today I am sharing my thoughts with you on a girls journey with tangible things in her life.
We as a kids are unaware of certain facts of life and take life so easily. I wish we can do the same as adults too.
she was 21 when she got married and was very ambitious and blunt but very soft-spoken. she lived her early life her way with a pure heart, completely unaware of the hard facts of life until she got married. Everything seemed so easy. I am talking about a very outgoing personality who had dreams in her eyes and always said one thing to everyone ever since her teenage that she will be the best businesswoman someday.
And yes she started her business too after 6 years of her so called marriage.
Marriage word changed her life. It changes everyone’s but for her, it was a drastic change. changed not for good I mean. Coming from a businessmen family, it was obvious (in India) she left her studies in between because in India if a girl is getting a good match that too on time(I mean between the age of 20-28), parents prefer to get her married.
In India, as soon as a child is born it becomes a dream for a parent to get them married more grandly especially in Punjabi or Baniya or Marwari families. They start investing for the D-Day from the day a child is born. Here, marriages are a grand celebration and a status symbol for the family. whereas in European countries, they put more emphasis on a really great education, I agree and appreciate it!
I wish, in India too people start thinking the same way.
Let me give her a name as she wants her identity to be kept secret. why? you will get to know by the end of this article. so, keeping her privacy in mind, I kept her name as Mandira.
After 6 months of her marriage, the happy marriage turned into a real Indian family drama where Mandira was told to cook but she hardly knew much about cooking as she always dreamt of doing a business. She was a pampered daughter in her paternal house. Cooking in the kitchen, of course, was not a dream.
she got married to a very typical family. Everyday fights started happening. she also got pregnant soon after her marriage.
she now got started beaten by her husband even though she was pregnant, for not being able to make breakfast for him. And sometimes because she was not an early riser. she told me once that when it was her first karwachauth, she went to get her mehndi done (which is a part of Hindu ritual) & somehow got late because of heavy traffic, due to which her husband dragged her inside the house from the place where she parked the car and beat her with belts so badly that she had to lock herself in the washroom because she had no other escape to make and just to get rid of the situation she had to drink the phenyl to end her life as she didn’t want to bear the pain.
Mandira was rushed to the hospital by her husband when he saw her condition getting worse. she was unconscious for a few hours.
when she came back to her senses she found herself in the ICU. She was in pain but at the same time, she loved her husband immensely. she was confused about how to react to it and what way she should choose.
she still remembers, she said, she asked the doctor on duty whether she should continue her married life or not? he replied, ‘this kind of person never changes and you should quit’. but she was in love and full of insecurities about leaving him. she was just 21 and not able to take bold decisions. This girl never cried before marriage. Her parents never slapped her even once all her growing years. These adverse changes were really hard to digest for her.
she still wanted to continue the relation with her husband. Her parent took her from the hospital back to her paternal house in a wheelchair. Imagine the pain such parents would have gone through. It was their daughters first karwachauth which was supposed to be celebrated in her husband’s house but unfortunately, you know how things were. she was completely shattered and didn’t want to do any rituals but her mom said to her to do the last ritual of praying to the moon so that at least she can perform one sagan ceremony after she got married & giving her hope, that it might go auspicious for her.
she wasn’t able to hold the strainer on her own so her mom holds it for her while she was sitting on the chair as she was unable to stand and with the deep pain inside of her, she went back to sleep.
After a few days, elders of the families sat together to make a decision on the topic. some relatives wanted this to end while other near ones still wanted them to unite as now they both have a new responsibility, their child. I wonder why a relationship has to go through all these real dramas. it’s about two people and why they try to impose their decisions on young ones.
why she was not supported then if she was so pampered child in the house? girls once get married, are really considered PARAYA DHAN as they say in INDIA.
Is it Indian mentality that they are scared of what others say? when others cant come and feed you in your bad times then why does their opinion matter? I wonder sometimes.
Still, a lot needs to be changed to call it a free INDIA. I believe!
I know our government is doing so much for women but such situations still exist! And so many of them are still going with the same or may be worse.
I will continue this story ………but I have to go to my work so I am ending for now.
I am raising funds for Mandira so that she can open her dream business and can start her new life after 20 years of her marriage.
Those who think they should support this cause, can reach me here.
let’s do something real and change at least one life for good!
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